HopeFul Reflections

When I was young I was always the type to allow myself to feel the pain of adversity, but I never let it stop there. Adversity was never the end, it was just an obstacle in my way. It is clearly evident that from my prior posts that I struggled with self esteem and confidence as a child, but if I was ever pushed enough into a corner and had the time to realize that I had to rely on myself I showed up for myself. As much as I am there for my friends, I have always been there for myself. It’s not my nature to sit around and feel bad for myself. I realize I have been doing that lately, but my true nature is to feel my struggle and overcome. Victory is not always guaranteed, but my terrific struggle with adversity will always come.

It doesn’t matter how badly I start because I know I am always terrible at anything I begin. It doesn’t matter who tries to put me down; I know internally that I was meant for more. That feeling of being meant for more no matter how desperate the situation came from belief that my Father’s plan was far greater than I could imagine. I truly did have faith and I didn’t let my ego tell me that I knew better than God. Unfortunately I feel like I have recently done that and it is a terrible sin which I plan to change. It also doesn’t matter how many hours it takes to fight my adversity, because work can always be done no matter who you are. That was always so beautiful to me. Work can always be done no matter who you are. While I do not have the vision my Father does, through faith and work I can glimpse at it. The great thing is, there is no barrier to work except my own will.

In all the difficulties of my life, I suffer when I only see things from an earthly perspective. However, when I decide to focus my thoughts on the Kingdom of Heaven and my Father, things change entirely. Suffering becomes a path to growth and progress. The work I put in is meant to bring me closer to redemption or unity with the beauty of God’s will. In feeling sorrow, I can appreciate that I was so moved by something as beautiful as one of God’s creations. In feeling passionate, I understand that I am lucky to be alive in this world given to me by my Father.

Therefore, I have no reason to feel anything but emboldened by the Spirit to live this life. In all the walks of life, God will walk with me holding my hand. I have no need to desire the things on Earth, when I am able to reach for my Father in Heaven.

-JKG